10 Reasons To Be Scrooge This Year
When is anyone ever really merry? Unless you’re a leprechaun, or a Smurf, or a gnome, or an elf, or one of the Merrymen, I can’t see it. Merry includes sing-talking, jovial dancing, and spreading cheer to others so they feel better or worse about the life they’re living.
Chances are they’re going to feel worse. When I think of anyone being merry, I envision tights, footsies, ukuleles, rainbows, orange moons, green clovers…you get the idea.
Not even slaphappy toddlers fit the description. How did this word become the sole adjective responsible for well wishes on December 25th? No one ever says, “Have a delightful Christmas,” or “Hope you had a swell Christmas.” I’m just saying, I don’t want to be merry.
What the hell is a one-horse open sleigh anyway?
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