MONDAY RAMBLE PART 9 “CHUG-A-LUG”

My introduction to alcohol was very late in my life. Sure I sipped beer as a toddler but it wasn’t until I was 15yrs old in Mr. Yaged’s Health class at Brooklyn Technical High School that my curious innocence led me to ask him “if alcohol tastes bad, why do people drink so much of it?” Yeah I know, hilarious. Well the look on his face had a fusion of expressions that bellowed “that’s a good attitude to have” mixed with “it’s the best feeling in the world you idiot.”

It looked as if a piece of him actually saw his own teenage self feeling the same way about liquor. But then it seemed as though he relived all the tragedy that was caused by the bottle in his entire life as he paused and didn’t answer for about 16 seconds. I imagined that drinking may have led to his divorce or his belly or even his job, (that I believe he still has) and I thought to myself that alcohol may not be the thing to rush into.

So yeah I shared some St. Ides 40’s over the next few years and I found out Ides was truly not one of the saints. I graduated to my own 22 oz. of Heineken here and there…Long Island Iced Teas, then Southern Comforts, E&J, and finally in my last year of higher education, my cohorts and I were purchasing 5ths of Hennessy per person…per weekend.

And I never questioned the reason for drinking again even though Mr. Yaged’s actual answer comes to mind when I think of the times I wish I would have turned down that last beverage.

He said, “Well it kills brain cells, decreases coordination, makes you get louder, brutally tell the truth, become more aggressive, forgetful, destroys your liver, attacks your kidneys, could lead to heart disease, lowers inhibition, creates excuses for people to do idiotic things and is the leading cause for fights in the club…over women.”

Bud Light commercials don’t reflect anything close to that sir, so pardon me if I find out the truth on my own. And I did, and although to this day I have never thrown up from drinking, I have passed out and majored in stupidity many times throughout my years. With that said, I was pondering what to give up for Lent this year and 40 days of sobriety seemed like a good idea until I saw this man in the train station saying something about not giving things up for Lent but how we should add things to our lives instead.

I was like “Word! Hell yeah. I’m gonna add on, not give up!”
But then I saw that guy ask for change to buy beer and then I realized he lived on the train, so maybe that WAS a -give up drinking sign-.

Then again he looked really happy and after a few more chats he told me the recession was helping him out because he was making more dollars per train car.

He boastfully said that if he wasn’t addicted to alcohol he could technically have a nice place and a car because he was potentially making about $60 an hour on workdays. And I wasn’t sure but for a second I thought, this guy might have taken Mr. Yaged’s class. I asked him and he said the name sounded familiar, but he might have thought I said jager, either way he introduced me to some cool brandy mixture he had in his flask so what do you know…I did add on.

You made it this far, might as well leave a comment, it makes a difference…